Sometimes I have to admit that part of my criticism for the present comes from some kind of nostalgia for a past I never even experienced and may have never even existed. I grew up reading American Girl books. My favorite was Molly, the bespectacled, pig-tailed, and ever-resourceful young lady enduring World War II on the home front. In my pre-teen mind, I would also grow to inherit a world filled with dashingly handsome brave men who asked you out on proper dates. They would arrive on time, chat with the folks, perhaps even bring a modest offering of flowers. In turn, I would one day be the perfectly coiffed demure lady in white gloves and red lipstick. My visions were a lot like “Mad Men,” with a gloss of sexual equality.
Cue the disappointment. Instead, the classic quandary: Does life imitate art, or is art imitating life? Please interpret art loosely, because by this I mean Judd Apatow movies. Don’t get me wrong. Any director that will consistently cast Paul Rudd can’t be all bad. But, every movie he does is one big fat ridiculous celebration of male mediocrity. Because every little girl’s dream might have involved some kind of prince, but realistically – it should’ve been an overweight, video-gaming, unshaven, pornhound with questionable hygiene. And in Apatow’s world, this douchebag with a heart-of-gold always gets his Katherine Heigl.
Is this the new normal? From my daily facebook perusals, it certainly looks that way. Por ejemplo, I enjoy (some) sports. Although, I’m not big on talking about it. (I think it always seems insincere, like I’m just showing off.) But I see all these women on facebook getting into HEATED sports discussions. I mean, the (white) gloves are definitely off. But it seems so contrived. Like “Hey look at me! I like sports! And I like them enough to make my profile picture that image from Calvin & Hobbes where he’s peeing on (insert sports team)’s logo. Tee hee!” So, it’s come to this? We’re not just settling for Seth Rogen’s character in “Knocked Up,” we’re actually wooing him. And how many people do you know who spend “dates” with their significant other just watching TV? Listen, a relationship can’t be built on episodes of NCIS and old Highlander re-runs. (I’m serious. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work.)
Someone needs to write that Pina Colada song circa 2011. “If you like playing Halo - and sitting on my couch . . .”
Interesting to hear a female's point of view on this. Courtship for men in the 21st century is just as bad. I blame Samantha from Sex and the City. So many girls think it's okay to randomly hook up with guys in a similar manner and then think when she meets Mr. Right, her past should have no bearing on the present. "Why does it matter" is the usual response. Furthermore, women complain about players, yet it is the Samantha clones that encourages players. Maybe this why so many of my friends have sworn off marriage. I think most of us modern guys have trust issues or something with modern American women. Maybe the demands are just too much.
ReplyDeleteAre you saying that someone can't turn around their once errant ways? I agree, though The Samantha mentality is pretty revolting.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I can assure you that when a man adheres to a higher standard, acts with courtesy and respect, and shows some initiative - it will be extremely well-received.
I'm not saying someone can't "change," I am just skeptical of that change being maintained. I was with a girl for a few years, and as time went on I discovered her past (quite a past too I might add). After a bit of hesitancy, I decided to stick with her since I figured I was in love. Anyways, she reverted back to what she knew and shit hit the fan. A terrible experience I never want to be involved with again, but it did make me aware of what I need to look for, good and bad.
ReplyDeleteChicks like gentleman as they get older and get burned by a few guys. Young girls like jerks, it's scientific.
Check this out Brandon- pretty good commentary on Sex and the City.
ReplyDeletehttp://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/tobyyoung/100040525/sex-and-the-city-is-about-as-feminist-as-a-copy-of-playboy/
Damn. That article was hilarious, insightful, and depressing all at once.
ReplyDeleteYes, I thought it was good as well. I also enjoy your blog Jordan, and appreciate your attention to grammatical detail. Nice.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Bradford. Apparently, you can tolerate my neurotic use of parentheticals.
ReplyDeleteBradford,
ReplyDeleteJust read the link you provided, and wow! It feels good for someone to validate your thoughts, but with better organized sentences. What bothers me is that girls just don't see it that way. There is a double-standard that exists between boys and girls, but girls are the gatekeepers and enable men to be man-whores, for the most part. I personally know a girl who is turning 31 this month and is fearful of not getting married because she suffers from the "Sex and the City" delusion of relationships. Most have "why does it matter" attitude, but that is just denying reality. If you were promiscuity in the past, change your behavior, act like a real feminine lady, and never tell your love interest of your past, or at least don't provide details. Check out this blog for a counterpoint http://roissy.wordpress.com/. One of many PUA blogs that have popped in recent years.